Lost in the Stars

     I've finally felt a little homesickness after not feeling it for about 2 weeks. This time, I wasn't missing my friends or family or house or school. This time I was missing the stars. 
     Now mind you, I don't live in the middle of a city. I live on the outskirts of a village, but there are always street lights and the sounds of cars on the highway the street over, the sound of children and their parents arguing in the streets, the sound of the neighbors moving furniture or whatever the heck they're doing. 
     I'm used to solitude. I'm used to going home to a relatively quite house (besides when there are screaming matches between family members) with my own room to lock myself in when I need to recover from a particularly hectic day. Mind you, I love having siblings that are actually close in age that I can hang out with, as my real siblings are much older than me and grew up across the United States from me.But I'm still getting used to always having people around, always sharing everything (my room with my sister, the bathroom with both siblings,etc.), and to living in an apartment, which is considerably smaller than my own home. Don't get me wrong, I couldn't be happier with where I am and the family that I have here, but it's still a bit different and, at times, still a bit strange. 
     I was at my host aunt's house the other night. She lives sort of in the mountains, has her own house, and we can actually see the sky there. That's when I realized just how much I missed the stars. Not just the stars...the peace, the tranquility of nature, the quiet of the night. I miss laying in the grass at my house, gazing at the vast, endless universe, trying to make out constellations. I miss hearing nothing but the crickets and the wind blowing through the leaves of the ridiculously beautiful green trees. I miss feeling at peace, like everything is exactly as it should be, like everything is perfectly at rest, one harmonious being, breathing as one, acting as one.
     I miss staring at the stars and being able to just THINK. Sometimes, I find that with all the things going on and all the people around me, I don't have time to just think anymore. That's what I love the most: when I can just ponder how meaningless human life is when you take into account the rest of the universe. It's so crazy to think that we are nothing. We are a tiny speck in the endless reality. There could be beings out there JUST LIKE US, or related to us but extremely different. And hey, maybe they're staring at the stars the exact same moment that I am, seeing a different set of stars, wondering if there's anyone or anything else out there that resembles the life they have. 
     In the grand scheme of things, the problems that we have just seem so meaningless. They seem so materialistic, so human, so relative. That's why I love to look at the stars. They put everything into perspective. And that's something I've been lacking for a while. Since I've gotten here, I've given too much reason to the problems I've had, making them more than they need to be. In the life that I was given, I've been blessed beyond belief, and I'm thankful for that. 
     I didn't realize just how much I missed the stars, the nature, the quiet, the peace. I didn't realize how much I missed the feeling of laying in the damp, cold grass, getting lost in the stars that cover the sky like a blanket, getting lost in the promises of life.